It is widely accepted that effective managers are good communicators, and we often make the short but illogical leap that people who are managers like to be around other people.   Sad to say, but it's not necessarily so.  It's not always easy to spot an introvert or an extrovert in a short encounter, however, because many introverts have taught themselves to behave in extroverted ways.

Let's Define Our Terms First

When we talk about introversion and extroversion, we are talking about how individuals use personal energy in their contact with other people.  Extroverts actually replenish their personal energy by interacting with, or being around, people, whereas introverts spend personal energy in the same circumstances.

An extrovert is a person who is energized by contact with people.  Talking with people, or even simply being around them in a crowd, fires them up.  An introvert is a person who is energized by solitary time, especially time spent on what he or she does inside his or her head.

It's A Continuum Out There

Extroversion and introversion are labels that define the extreme ends of a continuum.  The number of people who are extremely introverted or extremely extroverted is actually comparatively small, but most people have some degree of preference in one or the other direction.  As with all other basic personality characteristics, your place on the continuum exerts a strong influence on your behavior, but you can override that preference when you choose to do so, especially if you practice doing so.

Good Managers Are Good Communicators

It's widely accepted that effective managers must have good communication skills, but I go a little further.  To manage well requires not only that a person possess good communication skills, but also that the person be willing to use them whenever they are required and for as long as they are required.  A large part of a manager's day is filled with interactions with subordinates, vendors, clients, co-workers, and prospects, depending on the field he or she works in.  In other words, a manager spends a great deal of his or her time interacting with others.

Extroverts have an edge when it comes to being managers because they enjoy opportunities to interact with or be around others, and this strengthens and improves their communication skills.  The more a person does something, the better he gets at it, and so extroverts tend to get more practice at communicating with people because they naturally prefer to put themselves in circumstances where they can.  Extroverts I have known can feel drained after a long workday, and feel refreshed and energized by going to a party or public place in the evening.

Introverts, on the other hand, have to spend their personal energy in order to sustain contact with other people, and so introverted managers tend to "manage by memo," and find other ways to avoid what feels like "too much" contact with people.  They often rationalize this behavior by saying things like, "My people know their jobs.  I stay out of their way.  I don't micro-manage."  The danger for introverted managers is that unused skills tend to atrophy, just like unused muscles; an introvert's comfort level for dealing with people may actually diminish over time unless he or she finds ways to "practice" needed social skills.

For Introverts Who Want To Be Good Managers

Introverts can be good managers if they re-frame their understanding of contact with other people (yes, even casual, apparently pointless small talk!) as a necessary, non-negotiable part of being a manager.  For example, the more comfortable a manager is interacting with other people, the easier it will be to have difficult conversations with them about productivity or performance issues.

The first step to being an effective manager for an introvert is to put himself in positions where he can practice and improve communication skills.  Organizations such as Toastmasters, International, or seminars such as those offered by Dale Carnegie offer excellent opportunities to improve social skills by requiring regular practice with other people.  Finally, it is especially important that people who are introverts find ways to give themselves the solitary time they need, away from work if necessary (and it usually is) to replenish and restore their personal energy levels!  Introverts can be effective managers; it will just take more effort and will power.

There is a question on the Work Attitude Questionnaire (WAQ) that often prompts questions on the Performance Profile Report.  That question is #44 ("Patting a co-worker or subordinate on the shoulder or putting one's arm around his/her shoulder is OK as long as one is sincere and not making any kind of sexual advance.")  Respondents are asked to indicate, on a scale from 0 to 9, how strongly they "agree" or "disagree" with this statement.

A little over a third of all respondents choose a response of "5" or higher, which indicates agreement with the statement.  The Work Attitude Questionnaire Report presents these answers as responses that should be followed up in an interview, and the Frequently Asked Question (FAQ) is, "Patting a co-worker on the shoulder sounds innocent enough.  Why is it apparently not a good thing to agree with the statement in question #44?"  Put another way, does it mean that a person might sexually harass other people if they "strongly agree" with question #44?

Some People Are "Touchers" And Some People Aren't

Some people enjoy touching and being touched more than other people do.  Other people actually dislike physical contact with another person.  In addition, the "personal space" that a person considers inviolable varies from individual to individual.  On top of that, there tend to be regional differences in this country with respect to whether people touch one another other than formally shaking hands.  One of the things that the rate of agreement on question #44 could mean is that about a third of people tend to be "touchers."  The bad news is that we don't wear labels that identify us to one another as "touchers" or "non-touchers."

Innocent Gestures or Inappropriate Intrusions

Putting your arm around the shoulder of a family member or close friend is a common sign of affection, good will, or reassurance.  It is based on and demonstrates the deep rapport that develops among friends and family members.

Work relationships are different because the basis of the relationship is different.  Relationships with co-workers may develop into friendships, but that coincidence happens outside of the structure of the job itself.  Physical contact that seems natural or spontaneous outside of work, therefore, is inappropriate in on-the-job relationships because such physical contact may cross another person's "invisible" boundary.  It runs the risk of creating an offensive, hostile, or intimating atmosphere. 

This is especially true in work relationships where there is an authority or power difference; all too often, I have heard a manager say, "I can just tell which ones of my employees don't like for me to give them an encouraging slap on the back, and I leave them alone."  The trouble is that it isn't easy to know what is going on inside another person's head, especially when that person might feel constrained from telling you, the boss, what to do.

And The Answer To The FAQ Is…

If a person agrees strongly with question #44 on the Work Attitude Questionnaire (that it is essentially OK to pat co-workers or subordinates on the shoulder or arm), it does not mean that this person thinks it is OK to sexually harass other people.  But it does create an opportunity to train a new employee in the very real danger, based on differences between people, that one person's innocent gesture can seem like an inappropriate intrusion or even sexual harassment to another person.

Each individual decides for himself or herself what type of behavior constitutes sexual harassment.  Attorneys William Petrocelli and Barbara Kate Repa, in their book, Sexual Harassment On The Job, define sexual harassment as "…any unwelcome sexual advance or conduct on the job that creates an intimidating, hostile or offensive working environment."

The problem lies in the fact that what is seen as "sexual" and "offensive" to one person may not necessarily be seen that way by another person.  Lawsuits have been filed that are based only on a person's perception of a single act or instance of behavior as sexually harassing.  Whether these allegations hold up in court or are settled without litigation, they can cost a company thousands of dollars in legal fees and lost employee time, not to mention the disruption and rancor that they cause in the work place.

The power of the Work Attitude Questionnaire in this instance is in its calling a manager's attention to the need to make sure that all employees have been trained in the company's policies and procedures.  Following up on question #44 opens the dialogue that creates understanding and cooperation, which is the best way in the long run to foster a healthy work place environment.

The Best Policy:  At Work, Don't Touch

Agreement with question #44 on the Work Attitude Questionnaire, then, does not necessarily mean that a person intends to cross another person's boundary, but it might be a "red flag" and it certainly suggests the need that your company's policies, procedures, and consequences should be communicated clearly to this person.  In fact, that's more than just a good idea; your company's policy of sensitivity to individual differences and respect for each employee's personal space should be a matter of company policy: put simply – at work, don't touch.